The Tenth plage of Egypt was the death of the first born and the Israelites took the blood of a lamb to their doorposts so when the Angel of Death would pass through Egypt, the Angel would passover the houses marked by the blood of a lamb, to keep them safe.

Jesus, Died as the lamb for us. He gave himself for us out of love for us. But we still need to bear the blood of the Lamb for when the time comes we can be safe.

A quick thought that wasn't even my own. But I'd like to share it with you.

-The Beast

I Reserve The Right To Arm Bears

I love how every YEAR I get a new Awesome T-shirt. For my birthday anyway. :) Last year's t-shirt was- "Milk I am Your Father."

This year is kinda funny cause I didn't get it at first then, everyone laughed at me and I got it. :) S. Ed moment, cause I said it wrong. But I love making people laugh.

Anyway this year was- "I reserve the right to Arm Bears." :D

Awesome stuff. Life is going how it is meant to. Love, Trust and Shine!

-Beast Out

Always with me

I gotta wait two weeks to see if this door is opened and I get to walk in or if it is closed and I need to find a different door.

My birthday is Saturday. Years are beginning to go by faster and I'm more unsure about things than ever. But my trust is in the Love of my Perfect God. I'll praise him all the more cause I don't know where my life will take me. But he does and He'll always be with me.

Life is keeping me busy and a big door in my life is tomorrow. :) I don't have any fear of what will happen cause I know God's plan is the best and I know now more than ever that he is in control. I trust Him.

And life is going great cause I'm making it great.

Working is a great!

Pray if you get a second for tomorrow.

-Always the Beast

Fire within

My life has been full and busy and I like it. God is the center of my life again and I've been very happy about very little lately and it is kinda funny. And that makes it more funny. My heart was made soft again. And there is a fire within me, that I didn't start. That is warm and comfurting and is alive. Now I gotta go shine that fire.

God Bless You,

Trust, -Beast

A piece of my life

HEY, it has been awhile but I've been keeping busy. I'll call that a good thing. :)

I'm winning the battle for my heart and it is just a great feeling. The Love within softening all of me once again. Things still hurt but I just surrender the pain again and again as it arises within and it slowly becomes easier and easier to deal with.

Through the pain, I see God's control and all he has done for me and how he was in control always. Looking back on all of my life I can see his control of situations that arise and my trust in him grows more and more!

I'm leading a small class of some teenage boys with one of my close friends. I told them this Sunday and it still amazes me to look back and think of his control.

I'll go ahead and share what I did with them with you.

A piece of my life's testimony.

I'm not good with pubic speaking or even speech in general at times. But with God with me I am able to preach his word boldly and that is amazing cause it is through his strength and not my own. Being used by God is the most fulfilling feeling I've felt in my life. God gave me strength in my weakness.

I've tried to preach without God being my center and my strength and it was a failure in many ways. My life without him is empty and even with the distractions I try to put in my way. The emptiness of a loving God I once knew was still there. The Loving God that showed his love to me on that fence all toughs years ago. And I've been on fire for God for most of my life sense then, besides recently.

Recently, a girl took the middle of my life. I more I got to know her the more I believed She was everything that I wanted to one day marry. Also as I got to know her better she had some caution and red flags come up. I though of influence and how she told me she didn't like these areas of her life and I believed her that she would change.

I one day became head over heels in love with her and I didn't need her to change. I loved her for who she was. And I thought she was more in love with me then her, witch was such a wonderful feeling. To love someone and have that love returned.

I prayed for a lot of things in my life and there were two girls I prayed about and they were similar prayers. Basically, "Was she the one?"

The first time it wasn't a direct answer but I had a dream we were marring different people, I saw her in the white wedding dress and I thought I wanted to be with her. I couldn't see the bride I was marring or the groom she was marring. But I wrote that in my Journal and looking back that was shortly after I prayed asking if she was the one. I do believe that was God telling me no. But I lived that part of my life and it has helped shape me into who I am. There is nothing wrong with that girl we are just not meant to be. But I tried to make it work anyways but I was a lot more of a kid then.

The girl I fell head over hells for I prayed this before I had any clue what I thought of her. Anc this time God answered right that second. "I'm in Control." And then I get all happy cause I think God is telling me, I'm in control, I make the plans now go for it. Not, I'm in Control and I'll be with you though everything.

But I thought that she was the one and I would do anything for her that she wanted. Then that was put to the test on Thanks Giving Break. I was going to take a bus down a week before thanks giving and spend a week with her and then ride with her back to Kansas. And she wanted me to stay at her house with her.

I didn't know what to do for the longest time. She wanted me to stay at her house and I finally told her I would stay with her. That could of been trouble. But I didn't stay with her.

The day after I told her I would stay with her someone called me the day after I told her I would stay with her like she wanted. The person said. "I trust the two of you not to do anything, but other people will say things." among other things. But I didn't know if I trusted myself. And that staying with her would not be right. So I changed my mind and told her as soon as I got off work and that was that. I explained all of my reasons and I expressed all of my concerns that was shared with me on the phone. So I was no longer the guy who would do anything for her.

Then I took the long bus trip and she was different, more distant. I became more of a nervous wreck trying to find out what was wrong. Then she told me she felt different about me and that started the lowest point I've ever gotten in my life. And without my family, I wouldn't of made it.

I was thankful to be keeping busy with work and try to distract me from the pain. I was angry with God for letting me get so hurt like that. I hardened my heart sealed it up and placed walls to keep myself from the pain that could return. I lost trust in people, even God. My family cared for me so much but I tried to keep them out of my life and the harm I've caused still hasn't healed completely. And I miss the relationship I had with my Mom, Dad and sister.

But, I've seen how God has control over everything even through all of this. His love has broken all my walls and I'm made new again and every time I feel the pain. I just offer it up to God and he takes it. He just asks me to trust.

This girl became pregnant not too long after she said she wanted a break. But like she told me. "You gotta hold on to the good memories." and that is what I plan on doing for the rest of my life and when it hurt I just surrender it to God. For he is always there. He has never failed. He just asks us to believe, trust him and love others.

*This was a very personal and long post. Life is going great and keeping me busy, not enough for my king. But almost little to much to blog. ;)

-As always the Beast

The Mountain

I'm a unique person I am easy dishearten and easily uplifted. I care too much about some things and not enough about others. I worry too much about things I don't have complete contorl of and don't worry about the things I do have control of.

I know there is a God. I've had my moments of anger toward God, questioned God being in my life and more stuff. I've seen to go up and down this little mountain of mine, just slipping up at times. But I can say that I'm trying to climb, I tell myself daily to just trust and I've seen myself grow over time, and I try to love others. My friends around me and the stranger I may that I may never see again.

Love others and Trust.

-Beast

Song of the Month

It was really hard to pick the song of the month. I'm a big fan of Hillsong's worship CD's. I think I will just say just listen to some of them if you try them out.

Some of my favorites from them would have to be-

Hosana-

Inside out-

Mighty to save-

Awesome God-

But if you want one for the month. David Crowder Band's

-Never Let Go.

This song just proclaims God's hold on our life and how he never lets us go.

He wrote this after 9/11/01 and it just one of those great ones. Hope you enjoy.

-The Beast

Wow it is the first of the month, a friday and April fools!